Studios love to
capitalize on the success of other films, and most recently there has
been a huge wave of new adaptations of fairy tales since Tim Burton's
Alice In Wonderland was a huge hit in 2010. Nothing has really
taken off the way that one had though as the new Red Riding Hood
failed to please as did Mirror Mirror, the cuter of two
adaptations of Snow White. The other one, Snow White and the
Huntsman on the other hand was a financial success, though
audience reactions seemed mixed. What do I think of these? I have no
idea. I haven't actually watched any of these films, despite being
interested in a couple of them. I did however watch Hollywood's
latest curious spin on an old tale; Hansel and Gretel: Witch
Hunters, which expands the classic story, taking place after the
young siblings escape and kill the witch in the candy house. The spin
is that on that fateful night they were abandoned by their parents
and never saw them again. This takes place after that event.
Hansel and Gretel
(Jeremy Renner and Gemma Arterton) are all grown up and have become
bounty hunters, taking their resentment and bitterness toward the
witch that nearly killed them as children and making a lucrative
living killing witches all over the land. They have been called into
a town that is having a severe witch problem with eleven of the
town's children have gone missing. The town have had no luck because
in the woods is a very powerful grand witch (Famke Janssen) who can
disguise her grotesque appearance as a normal person. So... Hansel
and Gretel are on the case... to kill the witches and save the kids.
In all honesty, I
actually like the premise of this film. I think it's a fun spin on
the classic tale. One doesn't just nearly get killed by a witch and
then walk away from it as if nothing happened. What happened to
Hansel and Gretel? Well, they turned their misfortune into a living
and did the world good by killing witches. I could see writers having
a lot of fun coming up with that and building upon it.
That being said, the
delivery did not quite do the premise justice. It's not that it was
horribly made or performed, it just didn't really know what it was
trying to be. You see, the film is too juvenile to appeal to most
adults, but far too profane and gruesome to be suitable for children.
I guess that makes it just right for teenagers who sneak into films
that they shouldn't see. Hansel and Gretel shares a striking
resemblance to 2004's Van Helsing, Huge Jackman's star vehicle
after his first couple X-Men films. Flawed as it was, Van Helsing
had a better knowledge of what it was: a cheesy, fantasy, steam punk
horror for all ages. This movie is a cheesy, fantasy, steam punk
horror... but for almost no one.
The truth of the matter
is that the profanity doesn't fit well with the movie. I can take
swearing in cinema; I've heard it all before. But this is jarring. I
expect that it's the time period. It doesn't fit well in this strange
period piece, anachronisms and all. Yes, I understand that it's not
trying to be realistic considering all of the unrealistic steam punk
technology, but the language still makes it feel too modern and
inconsistent. And what does it add, honestly? I suspect that they
were aiming for humour with that at times, but it didn't achieve it.
That does feel like one
of the downsides of the film. It isn't nearly as fun as it should be.
It looks so dark and gloomy and lacks the lighthearted approach that
made Van Helsing work to some degree. This looks and feels
like it's taking itself very seriously, with a dark colour pallet and
grim, bloody visuals. Also, why not play around with the fantasy
technology a little bit more? If you have improbable weaponry,
sometimes it's fun to see how it works. We don't get to see the
imagination behind it, we just have to accept it. The direction is
inconsistent with the quirky, self aware script, as if the director
was not in on the joke. Not to say that the script is all that
amazing; it has it's moments, but drops the ball on some great
opportunities. Apparently Hansel is diabetic from when the witch
force fed him candy as a kid. This is a great idea, but is barely
touched on other than a way to force a little more tension into the
climax of the film. Shame really, I feel there could have been more
built on that.
The actors are in on
the joke luckily. Gemma Arterton and Jeremy Renner seem to be having
fun and their action sequences are often quite amusing. This movie
doesn't quite meet what they're capable of as actors, but as a
paycheque movie and a chance to test their star power in a typically
lacklustre movie season, taking this movie on doesn't seem like an
illogical move. I don't imagine it will do any damage to their image
at the very least.
What can be said about
Hansel And Gretel: Witch Hunters is that it is mildly amusing
and has some good action, which perhaps is all it promises. And if it
delivers that much in a season that is often used as a studio dumping
ground, should I really ask for more? Can I really expect a movie
with such a simple premise to deliver something more than mindless
action and blood splatter?
Actually, yes. Yes I
can.
2 Stars
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